some things I have been reading recently (links and such)
Posted by resonanteye on 06/26/2012
I was reading this, about horrible dating site profiles, which is hilarious.
And found this article about how men who have stay-at-home wives are more likely to be sexist in teh workplace.
Spending my paint-drying time on regretsy, of course. I love the forums there.
I went on a reading spree over at skepchick, and also found this site with some amazing photos.
I found out this shop used some of the drilled stones I sell to make awesome minimalist jewelry, and I started following this blog against body-shaming.
I’m doing a lot of paint-and-wait right now- also, I am in the process of trying to quit smoking, so my ability to respond to messages or remember what the hell I’m supposed to be doing, is kind of jacked right now.
If you have something on the way from me, or I am working on something for you, bear with me through this week of dooooom, ok? Thanks.
resonanteye.wordpress.com 
photographybyjames said
I used to crack up at the whole internet dating scene. Then I became a victim of it when my then wife met someone online. Years later I look at it the same way as I do bars, clubs, social events, and even community sponsored junk like walk-a-thons etc… just put people together and things will happen: a) invariably they will hook up with one another (married/committed or not) and b) some will float to the top like cream (in other words by their behavior), and c) others sink to the bottom like what’s that Italian word for concrete filled 55 gallon drum?. You see leaders emerge, comedians, followers, and floaters. Sluts, layabouts, and some brilliant thinkers. Of course, it is a microcosm, or anymore a representative slice of our society. So, then it must be just luck that two people can find each other or the sheer volume of people sharing bits drives the odds up.
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photographybyjames said
I have an horrible online dating profile…
When I posted where I have been in the world and some of my vacation spots and jobs, I get lots of bubble headed idiots responding.
When I changed all that to my life philosophy and how I like to spend my days and nights along with the truthful lil detail that I am a recovered alcoholic/addict, I get zero responses.
Food for thought?
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resonanteye said
not beyond that it’s difficult to have good conversation in general, let alone in a meat-market sort of environment online.
I personally wouldn’t respond to ads for people who have kids, are misogynist, racist, or people who are in recovery. But I do and have dated people who are mentally ill, or not conventionally attractive/HWP. So to each their own
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photographybyjames said
Oh I forgot about that! It is so easy for me to feel normal that I forget I am bipolar. Odd thing about it is, people are completely okay with it if they get to know me before I disclose that. If I mention mental health or medication too soon, they are prone to bolting.
It is not always easy to to see the sexist or the racist but a good clue sometimes is hidden beneath a JC veneer…
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resonanteye said
I tend to just read a profile all the way through- sexism is easy to see; so is anger or bitterness toward a gender. I think racism is a bit less hard to figure out at times because unlike sexism, it’s less socially accepted so people will try to hide it.
As a nonreligious person I never responded to religious folks on dating sites when I used them; it’s just something I can’t overlook.
But I think that a lot of the posts on that site are hilarious- the link I put in teh post. Mainly because people seem to feel entitled to attention, or get angry when someone isn’t interested.
I think, just from my own experiences, that finding a good relationship involves a lot of trying-on, a lot of waiting and a lot of time spent just plain living.
I always disclose my mental illness and things like that early on. I figure it’s easier to get the controversial stuff out of the way at the start, to avoid misfit later on.
And I think a lot of it is that everyone has their thing, different strokes. If someone doesn’t like your age, height, name, etc, they’re just not going to be interested no matter how angry you get or how you phrase things, there’s no magic “make-them-like-me” word or magic trick. I think a lot of people wish so hard for that that they forget it isn’t a real thing.
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